It is not easy to let go! It is hard to let go of things, people, feelings, or ideas that don’t serve us anymore. Yet, it is vital to living and loving to let go of these kinds of things so that we have more room for new things or new ideas that move us forward in our lives, our relationships, our achievements, and our successes. Children need to do this as well as adults. The Sedona Method for Children helps with this.
The Sedona Method for Children (and all of us) allows us to let go of emotions swirling around our brains!
I am going to concentrate on the basics of how to let go of our emotions, because they can drive us crazy, block our paths, and hinder growth.
The Sedona Method is a wonderful reference for doing just that.
Check out their website if you want to learn more: http://www.sedona.com/Home.asp.
Basic guiding principles of The Sedona Method I have learned:
Feelings are just feelings. They have almost no substance. They are like clouds passing through you. You feel them, but you do not have to keep them!
Feelings are useful to be aware of. Feel what you feel, let them go, and you will feel lighter and more at ease. “I feel ____ (anger)” is appropriate, “I am ____(angry)” is not. “I feel” statements place the feeling as external to our being. “I am” statements focus the feeling as part of your body and your being. Feelings don’t need to part of you.
Awareness allows you to respond appropriately. Hunger tells you to go eat; thirst tells you to go get a drink; anger and frustration tell you there’s something you don’t like and a problem needs resolving; happiness tells you what you like and that you want to repeat this behavior and continue to have this feeling.
Feelings can hold us back. We can get stuck in feelings for so long that we become our feelings. We end up with a general mood every day that we may not like. For example, when we feel sad or angry, if we keep our feelings inside for a long time, we end up physically holding them. We look sad with unhappy facial expressions and hunching our bodies over. We look angry with our faces scrunched up, our jaws clamped together, and out hands clenched! Picture these! As time passes, we are sad or angry and that sadness spills over into all parts of our life. Anger, for example, becomes our strongest emotion, at the ready to be angry about everything in life.
Don’t let certain feelings take over your life and your pursuit of happiness!
We think of feelings as good or bad. Try to not do this.
Feelings have opposites: happy/sad, light/dark, good/bad, right/wrong. We judge our feelings and those of others.
To let go of feelings is in our basic human nature. When a baby is learning to walk, how many times do they fall down? Lots, right? Do they cry and carry on every time they fall? No, they get back up and try again. Ever see a baby look around to see what to do when they fall? Sure, they let it go and get back up again! If a parent is at the ready to give “Uh, oh!” with a sad or surprised face and vocal intonation, what happens? The baby cries! How many times does a kiss on a boo-boo make it all better?
BTW- No feeling is bad. It is the wanting of things that conjure up feelings. Do I want to get an A on that math test?
How will I feel if I do and how will I feel if I don’t, get the A? If I don’t get an A, will I feel totally defeated and let it ruin my whole weekend?
We can all Let Go even for a moment. You can decide No, not to let go and that if that is your true feeling, then say NO. If you can and are able to let go, say YES. “Could I” let go means you are capable of letting go even if you do not want to. “Would I” is an invitation to let go. “When?” is an invitation to let go now.
Here are the questions from The Sedona Method to ask yourself. Use these to ask your children when they are having strong feelings. Get comfortable, try to relax, you may close your eyes or leave them open. How do you feel after the session?
Think of a situation or a feeling you are having now in your life.
Could I welcome the sensations, pictures, and sounds of that situation? (just for now)
Could I, as best I can, just for now, let it GO?
Would I, just for now, let it GO?
Apply The Sedona Method for Children is satisfying when they are able to move beyond hurting emotions and become happier.
Heal Yourself – Transform the World